Thursday, February 14, 2013

#1: Lentolutions and Giving up TV

Ah New Years. The time of year where people make a fresh start, set goals, and are determined to lose those last 5 pounds, train for a marathon, or find their soul mate. For about 3 days. I have a theory. The reason we all try (and fail) at keeping our new year resolutions is that
a) we really don't think that much about it
b) we aren't sober when we are thinking about it, and
c) 365 days is a freaking long time to keep something up for!
So that's why I gave up on them 4 years ago and started making Lentolutions instead.

What are Lentolutions, I hear you ask bemusedly from your IMacs. My theory is simple. I have from New Year's until the beginning of lent to figure out what it is that I really hate about myself. Also, during that time, I have built up enough guilt and self loathing that I can actually commit, for forty days, to changing that behaviour or attitude. Just in case I can't, there is always Sunday, that sweet blessed day of rest, where I can bath myself in holy water and eat as much chocolate as I want.

So needless to say, I have been thinking about what I would be doing for lent since yesterday when I was eating pork chops and realized it was Ash Wednesday. I made the snap decision to give up television for lent. A bit of a cop out considering I don't really watch that much in the first place. Then, inspiration struck. Call it divine intervention if you will.

Hipsters don't own televisions. What if I became a hipster for lent?

I was salivating at the thought. There is something alluring about hipsters. Is it the sock bun, the vintage wayfarers, improper adherence to hygiene or just their blatant disdain for anything remotely attractive I do not know. What I do know is that secretly, I want to be one. I know, I know; even saying that puts me out of the clique. No matter how well I cover myself up in plaid shirts, skinny jeans and hand crafted jewelry, as soon as it starts to rain they will sniff me out. However, the Walking Dead has taught me that if I want to survive this apocalypse, I need to aim for the brain.

And so here it is, my first installment in a forty day project that will perhaps make me less fashionable, more environmentally aware and perhaps even a little more talented. For each day of lent, I will undertake a daily hipster challenge. I will need to talk, do, make, wear and consume like a hipster. Each day, I will post on my blog about what reactions, successes or failures I encountered while living out my hipster life.

On that note, I will leave you with a favourite quote of mine. You probably haven't heard of it before, cos like, it's pretty obscure:

"The best minds are destroyed." - Allen Ginsberg

Let the hipster apocalypse begin.

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